Terms and Titles
In My previous lesson I gave the etymology of My preferred title, “Mistress.” I love the word, and I love to be called “Mistress,” as it means the Woman who owns you, molds you, teaches you, who is in control, and who answers to no one. It encompasses so much meaning.
Continuing in that vein, I thought I would give MY definition of other titles.
* Please note that these are MY PERSONAL definitions and other may not agree.*
TOP: A generic term for the person who is doing things to someone else.
SADIST: One who enjoys causing/giving pain. Originates from the name of the Marquis DeSade, who’s controversial writings explored acts of violence in an erotic context.
DOMINA: I use this term to refer to Myself only when speaking with other Dominant Ladies. To Me it is a sign of respect to Them, implying that I am Dominant, but also willing to learn from those who know more than Me. Classically, it simply means the Lady of the house, but the diminutive “mina” makes it a title that I think connotes a sort of nod of respect toward the person to whom one is speaking.
DOMINATRIX: I use this term to refer to Professional Women in the BDSM industry. It simply is the feminine form of one who Dominates, and was originally used to describe the Roman Empire.
DOMME: The feminine of Dom, which got it’s start in the Catholic church as a title for one’s Superior. I use it as the generic term when speaking about a Dominant Lady, rather than to Her (when speaking to Her, I would refer to Her as Mistress).
GODDESS: For religious reasons it’s not a title I am personally comfortable attaching to Myself, though I have no issue with other Women embracing it. (For Me this is a title given to a force or energy, rather than to an individual person.) Classically “Goddess” is defined as a preternatural or supernatural immortal being represented as female. The contemporary definition has broadened to include a woman revered as divine or adored as physically attractive or of superior charm and intelligence.
GURU: This a term close to My heart, though I would never refer to Myself as Guru, since it is a title that is typically bestowed upon one by a devotee or follower, not given to one’s self. It literally means, one who gives light, or dispeller of darkness. In a generic sense, it simply means teacher. It’s contemporary use includes those who are leaders in their particular field.
SATGURU: This is an even more personal term. It is used to denote the person who leads you PERSONALLY to enlightenment or facilitates your transcendence. Sat means “True” or “Ultimate.”
bottom: the generic term for the person who is getting something done to them.
submissive: One who submits to the will and whims of another, and endures discomfort or embarrassment (and pain if within agreed limits) for that person. A submissive often revels in service to another.
masochist: Someone who enjoys pain. Taken from the name of Leopold von Sacher-Masoch, writer of Venus in Furs, a famous 19th Century tale of a slave and his Mistress.
slave: Someone who is “owned” by another (temporarily or long term), revels in service to that person, and has agreed to do anything the other person demands or requests of him.
fetishist: someone who indulges in a specific act or needs a certain object (or scent, atmospere, etc.) to become aroused.
pervert: for Me, this is a term of endearment to connote someone who is imaginative in their sexuality and sensual play.
slut: another term of endearment for someone who likes to “get done.”
pet: a slave or submissive to whom the Dominant person/owner shows affection. Sometimes the pet is literally treated as an animal, such as a puppy, kitty, or pony.
vahana: literally a “vehicle.” Typically a special slave that is useful to his Mistress in fulfilling Her wishes and goals.
s.a.m. (smart ass masochist): a non-submissive masochist who likes to challenge his Top (usually with verbal quips and brattiness).
There are more than listed here, and I may add to it as time goes on.